Oh and Governor Palin

Good luck to you on your soon to be obscurity. I hope that wherever it takes you, be it throwing eggs at Planned Parenthood offices or Internet porn videos about the naughty after hour antics of Catholic school teachers, that you will be living in a state that is so pro-America it'll make you barf up your moose steaks all over every newspaper that you read...since you read all of them. Please tell Corey Feldman I loved him in the Burbs and give my regards to the Runaway Bride.

Boy, my contempt for Sarah Palin is getting so ridiculously heavy handed. To my 1 to 5 readers* (1 includes myself) I apologize for my most ungentlemanly behavior and tone.

I just can't stop myself. See I'm a straight talking maverick who bucks his own party and so I just cut through the Hebrew National Bologna of Washington insiders and tell it like it is. I think every Joe from Joe Six Pack to Joe the Plumber to Senator Joe Biden of Scranton to Joe Mamma would understand that as a true American, I just have to tell it like it is and be a complete asshole with no regard for other people's feelings or livelihood so long it is profits my shallow and compulsive drive for prestigious positions where I can make decisions that ruin people's lives and profit a few oil executives that mask their underlying depression and low self esteem with narcissistic plans to gain more power and control while eradicating 1 in 4 mammals and putting the entire human race in grave peril. I mean, after all, that's what we straight talkin' mavericks do. So while I may not have the polished Ivy League snobbish eloquence of say, Barack Obama, at least I tell it like it is and would never mean any disrespect to Joe the Plumber since he's proven to be such a useful pawn and gimmick for my fake populist surface talk that hides my contempt for America, humanity, and all sentient beings including my own family and self. I'm sure all true Americans would understand.

And yes, I am heavy handed. I'm a straight talkin' maverick. Being heavy handed goes with the territory. You got a problem with that and you'll get bitch slapped by Bill Kristol and David Brooks. So look out. 'Cause there's nothing scarier than getting bitch slapped by incompetent thinkers that the New York Times keeps employed to make it appear that they are not liberally biased.

Any way, Governor. Best of luck. With all sincerity I hope that you have enough health insurance for serious psychoanalysis and a full regimen of healing while serving time (for Troopergate, etc) in a new prison system that values rehabilitation over retribution.